What Happens Now?
by vampvixen01
Summary: When Edward left Bella in New Moon something happened with Alice he'd rather not discuss...Now the truth is out.Will Bella and Edward sort it out or will her & Jasper get closer through the pain?I dont know i havnt decided yet but its good so READ.lol PLZ
1. Prologue

**What Happens Now?**

Disclaimer: I wish I owned them, however, I don't. The characters portrayed in this story are owned by the very talented Meyer, I'm just want to borrow them.

**Authors Notes: **

Just a few notes. I don't know what the outcome of this story will be, I'm living it in my head as I write and imagining what I think would happen in each situation.

This is set sometime after New Moon. Plus all the Cullen's are still in school. Please imagine that they are all the same age and are all graduating at the same time.

Any character thoughts are in italics which I'm sure I didn't need to say but thought i would in case anyone finds it confusing.

One final thing...PLEASE REVIEW! This is my first fanfic so I don't know if I'm very good at it but I'm really enjoying writing it. If I don't get any reviews then I guess I suck and I'll just go and sulk in a corner sniff PLEASE REVIEW!

**Prologue**

It's amazing how everything can change in the blink of an eye. The shifting of reality to a nightmare is often a key feature of life. Are our lives pre-destined or is the future dependant of the choices we make? What if the choices we make, are wrong?

Life in Forks was often repetitive, with the sun rarely visible behind rain clouds and interaction with the same few people each day. Bella and Edward didn't mind this fact; they chose to revel in it instead. Their previously unsteady relationship had recently developed anchors, holding their once turbulent connection on a steady and flat surface. Edward had left her once before, causing her to crumble and almost cease to exist. After much persuasion, Bella agreed to trust in her soul mate once more, content in the security he offered her within their bond of love. The couple had never been happier- until that fateful day the world fell around them.

It was once said that the 'truth will set you free'. The saying hangs in every creatures heart, sometimes as a tool of encouragement and sometimes as a mocking form of torture.


	2. Chapter 1 Waiting for her

_**Saturday**_

**Edward's POV**

"God I'm bored!" I let out an exasperated sigh as I flicked through the hundreds of available television channels, finding nothing of interest. Rosalie and Emmett were in the garage making modifications to Bella's truck- well Rose was doing the work, Emmett was the jack, and Carlisle and Esme were having some rare 'alone time' locked in the privacy of their room. _I miss Bella_. Bella had been visiting Renee for the past week and the time away from her almost killed me- metaphorically speaking.

_She should be home any minute now._ _Maybe I should be there waiting for her so she knows how much I missed her. No, she might want to unpack and settle back into her room before I start pestering her. But what if she's upset that I'm not there and she is actually expecting me to be._

The clock read 5.46pm. I resolved to wait five more minutes and then I would call to see what she wanted. The last thing I wanted to do was intrude on her 'human time'. _She must be exhausted after the journey back and Renee probably wore her out. _I glanced back toward the clock- 5.47pm..._Dammit__, I'm calling now. I can't wait any longer._ I reached for my phone but was interrupted by Japer bounding down the stairs.

**Jasper's POV**

_Shit where did I put that CD? _"Alice have you seen my CD? The one I burned the other day?" I turned toward my beautiful Alice, her face angelic in the shadows of the sun which flowed through our window. She was lying on our bed reading yet another fashion magazine and seemed deeply engrossed. My angel looked up to the ceiling, thinking for a moment before replying, "Didn't you lend it to Edward the other night?" I jumped to my feet and kissed her the top of her head before I left the room. I looked into her face and wondered where I'd be without this precious person in my life. She was everything I had ever wanted and I couldn't believe she had chosen to share herself with me. Bouncing down the stairs I was hit with agitation and restlessness- _poor Edward, she'll be back soon. _

"Hey Edward, do you still have that CD I made the other day?"

"Oh yeah sorry I meant to give that back. It's in my room somewhere, I'll go look for it in a minute."

He looked deep in thought and his distraction was evident in the bouncing movement of his leg and the tapping of his fingers against one of the sofa cushions.

"Edward, if you want to call Bella just call her. I'm sure she's as anxious as you."

He looked up, startled by my words and then broke into a grin at the reassurance I provided.

"You're right. God I'm crazy. Can I look for your CD after I've spoken to Bella or do you need it right now?"

I held my hands up and looked at my now euphoric brother, "no rush." I was still shocked by the intensity of his and Bella's relationship. The first time he had introduced her to me, I could tell that this was a match for life. He looked at her like she was a precious flower that needed protecting from the winter frost- fragile and beautiful; a gift to be treasured. As he reached for the phone I said "tell you what I'll go look myself, that way you don't have to rush you're convo with Bella. Oh by the way, Alice said she would walk through her house door at exactly 6.07pm."

I was halfway through his bedroom door, throwing down to him a feeling of happiness and excitement, when I heard him chuckle a reply, "thanks man, I needed that."

_Ok...Where do I start?_ I surveyed the mess in front of me. Normally his room was exceptional, yet the lack of Bella the past week had sent Edward into a state of depression and restlessness. I had heard him often listening to half a song, then skipping to the next in an attempt to find a distraction. He had cleared his unwanted clothes from his closet and left them in a pile near the foot of his bed, ready to take to a charity shop. He had removed his vast collection of music from the walled shelves and now had them scatted along the floor so that he had an excuse to re-organise them. I laughed silently to myself as I sat myself down beside the huge bed which dominated the room and began sifting through the numerous CD's.

It was then that I noticed it.


	3. Chapter 2 How could you?

**Jasper's POV**

Anyone with less heightened vision may have missed it as it sat silently under the bed, against the centre of the wall. I would know that object anywhere as I had been the one to make the purchase. I reached over and lifted the garment out from the darkness and the scent hit me..._Alice_.

Snarling I grabbed the thong and flew into mine and Alice's room, throwing the object onto the magazine she was holding. She looked up in surprise, a smile gracing her lips.

"Thanks Hun, I have been looking for this everywhere. Where was it?"

I looked into her trusting eyes and felt nothing but contempt. Her smile began to waver as she noticed my stance. That was when I told her my discovery. Her smile was replaced with a grimace and pain filled her eyes.

**Alice's**** POV**

I looked up and Jasper and felt dread as I took in his dark eyes and rage fuelled posture.

"I found it under Edward's bed. Funny place to find your wife's underwear, ya know, under your brothers bed. At first I thought maybe it just got lost with his laundry and somehow slipped own of his basket of clean clothes without him noticing, but then I noticed that they have been worn...by you. Your smell is all over them. So please tell me what I am thinking is wrong. That I'm deluded to think that you would do this to me."

I looked in his eyes and the saw the pain lurking there. I wanted to tell him he was wrong but I couldn't lie to him like that.

The only thing I could say was, "I made a mistake...we made a mistake. It was one time and we were both upset. It was soon after Bella's birthday, after you took off and I didn't know how to help you and you seemed like you didn't want any help from me. I hadn't seen you for days. Edward had just been to see Bella and had told her we were leaving. He was devastated and we were in his room talking and then we made a mistake we have both regretted ever since." I saw him shake his head and turn towards the hall, with his fist clenched so tight his shoulders were shaking from the force. "IT WAS A MISTAKE, WE DIDNT DIDN'T MEAN FOR IT TO HAPPEN!" I shouted after him but it was too late, he was already downstairs.

**Edward's**** POV**

6.08pm..._She's definitely home._ I reached for the phone with a trembling hand, _why do I feel so nervous it's only Bella...My Bella._ Dialling her number quickly, the line rang twice and then I heard the sweetest voice in the world.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby," I sighed, "I couldn't wait any longer to call I have missed you so much."

I heard the smile in her voice as she said:

"I missed yo..." I didn't hear the rest of her response as I was sent flying through the air by Jasper and pinned to the ground. _WTF?_ His fist connected with my face as he let out a roar.

"You son of a bitch! How could you do this to me?! How could you sleep with her?"

I laid there in shock, not knowing how to respond. As his fist came towards me again he was suddenly pulled back by my bear of a brother Emmett. Rosalie's face came into view, one of pure fury as she glared at Jasper.

"What the hell do you think you're doing Jasper? We have enough enemies already without you attacking Edward for no good reason!"

He snarled his response with more hatred than I thought possible for such a sensitive creature.

"He fucked Alice!!"

The look of shock and disgust that passed over my siblings' faces and the faces of Carlisle and Esme, who were now present to witness the show, cut me deeper as I was overwhelmed with shame. It was then that I noticed Alice at the foot of the stairs shaking and looking mortified. Then we heard the whisper and all was still. All I could hear was the breaking of my heart.

"Bella knows now."


	4. Chapter 3 Nothings left

**Bella's POV**

I stood still with shock at what I was hearing. Could this really be true? They wouldn't do this to me-would they? She's my best friend and he is the one person I have ever loved. _After everything that happened between us, he wouldn't keep this from me__. Jasper is wrong. Oh poor Jasper he must be hurting so much to believe this...still, he'll be fine once this misunderstanding is sorted out._

I stood there knowing what I was hearing was lies, which is why I couldn't understand the numb feeling spreading through my body. The phone was still cradled in my arms, pulled tight against my chest as I slid against the kitchen counter to the floor. Sitting as still as stone I stared ahead of me, not noticing anything of my surroundings. The tears slid freely now as I accepted the possibility that Jasper could be right. I don't know how long I sat that way, clinging to the phone in an attempt to grasp an essence of reality. I didn't realise when my forehead rested against my knees, curling myself into an even tighter ball. I didn't notice when Edward arrived either.

"Bella." His voiced was choked as her spoke my name. I looked up after a moment of contemplation; _do I want to see the truth in his face?_ His face was contorted with anguish but I felt no emotions at that point. They say a human brain has a shut down mechanism to protect the body from pain. I wondered if mine had kicked in again. I hadn't felt like this since the last time I was forced to say goodbye to him. He approached me slowly as though he was scared I would attack.

"Please tell me it's not true. Just tell me and I will believe you. You couldn't hurt me like that again, you promised you wouldn't." My lips trembled and my body shook as I begged him to lie to me. I suddenly realised that I sounded like a child, crying for their parent's forgiveness. I was full of desperation and that was reflected in my voice, yet looking into his eyes I knew the truth.

"Bella...baby please, I'm so sorry...I'll do anything to make it up to you. I've regretted it every day. You're everything to me, I can't lose you again." He was on his knees in front of me now, holding my face his cold hands which suddenly made me cold throughout. I saw tears falling from his eyes; I never thought to ask if vampires could cry...now I knew. He touched his head to mine as we both sobbed quietly.

"Please don't cry Bella. I'm sorry I hurt you again...sshhhh, it's all going to be ok, I'll make it alright I promise." He hummed my lullaby as he pressed kisses to my temples and eyelids, presumably kissing away my tears. My lullaby was the tool that shook me awake. As he pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth, following the trail of my tears, I began to shake my head and pull away. He held on, crying harder now, "no, no, this can't be it, please don't pull away from me. I'll do anything, but please don't leave me." I reached my hands up and pried his fingers from my face.

I took a deep breath and said the words I never expected to utter, "Edward, please leave. I can't be near you."

"YES YOU CAN...you're just in shock and I expect that but don't give up on me please. I'll explain and then we'll be fine...you can love me again, I know you can." The panic that laced his voice filled me with emotion, anger and hurt.

"I do love you, but I can't trust you." I pushed him back with all my strength and he actually stumbled back and slid to the floor in front of me. "How could you do that to me? Why do you keep hurting me? I let you in and all you do is break me. I CAN'T TAKE THAT ANYMORE! There is nothing left in me to ruin...it's all gone, YOU TOOK IT ALL!" I looked at his beautiful face one last time and turned away from him whilst whispering (it was all I could manage), "I gave you my heart and you crushed it...its shattered Edward, you can't fix that."

"I can...I will." He was in so much pain, but not as much as I was.

"The pieces are lost now; you can't fix what you can't find Edward."

I pushed myself up from my position, reattached the phone and walked to my room. I left him lying on my kitchen floor, crying for his mistakes.


	5. Chapter 4 After the storm

_**Sunday**_

In the space of a day, four hearts were broken; four hearts were seemingly ruined due to a moment of weakness. All was quiet in the Cullen Household, each family member feeling as though a death had intruded on their lives. Grief settled over them like a dark cloud, shocking their emotions into a cycle of denial, anger, sadness and helplessness. Edward locked himself away in his room for the day, unable to move from couch where he cried and begged God for forgiveness. Sitting on the black leather, he mourned the loss of his Bella and cried for their lost future and the pain he had caused.

After talking throughout the night with Alice, Jasper packed a small bag of essentials and left the household. Esme cried and pleaded with him to stay and try to sort things out but the pain he felt in himself was too much, and combined with the agony of the other family members he felt exhausted and crushed. Carlisle made Jasper promise to come back soon and gave him space to sort out his thoughts.

Alice was curled in a ball in the corner of her recently destroyed room. Her's and jaspers belonging now smashed and shredded, laying around the floor from Jaspers angry outbursts. Photographs of the couple we piled on their marital bed in pieces after Jasper had torn them in front of her face.

Rosalie and Emmett stayed in their room the entire day also. They sat on their bed huddled together to block out the shouting from Jasper and Alice's room, and the howls and sobs of pain from Edwards. They had never been more grateful to their stable relationship, yet had never felt more upset as their family broke around them.

Bella spent the day in her room also. Sleeping and crying, trying to rid her mind of the image she had conjured of Edward and Alice naked and tangled in each other's arms. She told Charlie she felt ill and wasn't sure if she was coming down with something. He left her alone then, telling her to call if she needed anything. The only thing she needed however was peace.


	6. Chapter 5 How could they?

_**Monday**_

Bella woke at 6.00am to the shrill sound of her alarm clock.

**Bella's POV**

_Great, school._

I sat up slowly and rubbed my tired, blood shot eyes. _How can I spend the day around the two of them? I wonder if they will even be there. _Taking a calming breath, I made my way downstairs and to the kitchen where Charlie was eating his morning breakfast.

"Morning Bells, how you feeling now kiddo?"

"I actually don't feel too great dad, do you mind if I stay at home today? I'll call someone and ask them to get me any work I miss." I prayed he would believe the excuse of sickness and began to feel nervous as he looked at me with a critical stare.

"Yeah of course that's fine. If you're no better tomorrow though, you might want to go see a doctor, you're not normally sick. Do you want me to pop back at lunch and check on you?"

"Oh no that's fine Char...Dad, I think I will probably just sleep again and maybe read a little."

He rose from his seat, his coffee cup in hand as he turned to place it in the sink. When he turned back to me I felt overwhelmed with guilt at the worried look gracing his face. He walked toward me and kissed my cheek lightly.

"Alright, well I'd better be off, call me if you feel worse or want anything ok? I will see you tonight."

He walked to the door and lifted his coat from the rack, ready to leave. He turned once more, gave me a small smile and then left to protect Forks from the limited amount of crime we have here. I trudged upstairs feeling exhausted but there was a place I wanted to go. I dressed quickly in a pair of sweats and a V-neck cashmere jumper to help ward off the cold and slipped my feet into my comfortable UGG boots. I pulled my coat on and left through the front door not bothering to shower, brush my teeth or my hair and walked slowing into the woods beside my small house. I walked to the spot Edward had left me the year before. I noticed a broken piece of tree to my left which I stumbled towards and sat upon quietly.

I stayed still for a long time, thinking about, and looking at nothing in particular, just embracing the pain that lingered in my chest.

"Hey."

Startled I looked behind me and saw Jasper standing with his gaze lowered to the ground. He looked terrible. His hands were in his pockets with his shoulders hunched. He looked like a little lost boy.

"Hi," I sighed, "how are you doing?"

He shrugged a little as he walked towards me and sat on my right hand side, placing himself on the rest of the log stump. We stared ahead together for a while, neither of us keen to break the silence. We just sat, two wronged parties, feeling hurt together. Finally Jasper spoke, breaking me from the trance I was in.

"Didn't feel like school huh?"

I shook my head sadly. "I couldn't face seeing them. I have too many classes with Ed..." I gulped and continued, "him. I don't want to see him right now."

He took an unneeded breath before replying. "Me too. I don't want to see either of them."

"Oh, so they went in then? I guess I made the right choice staying away." I looked towards him and noticed the mess of his hair, as though he had run his hands through it many times. _Edward did that a lot._

He looked back at me then. "I don't know. I moved out of the house last night. I couldn't be there anymore. Their emotions were killing me. Not just theirs but the whole family. Carlisle and Esme are worried sick about all of us. Emmett is worried about us and Rose. Rose is feeling very bitter and angry. She's worried sick about you and I. You especially I think. I heard her ranting to Emmett that she could kill Edward for hurting you again."

I looked at him with confusion written all over my face. "But she hates me, why would she care?"

He looked sadly into my eyes, "I don't know if Edward told you but she was wronged when she was human...by a man that she loved. He was her fiancé. He raped her and then left her for dead. That's when Carlisle found her and changed her. The attack was so brutal she was dying. I think she sympathises with you especially because you're human and a woman. You're more fragile than me."

Shaking my head I put my hand on his tentatively, not wanting to startle him. "Just because my heart beats doesn't mean it's feeling this anymore than yours. I think we are both just as fragile at the moment." I turned my head back to the distance, still holding his hand in mine. His fingers enveloped mine, holding tightly to the bit of comfort I offered, but being careful not to cause any harm.

"You're right I don't feel very strong now."

I felt my lower lip begin to tremble and my hand started to shake in his. I felt the tears rising fast and it was impossible to stop them. Letting out a strangled moan I gave in to the sobs that engulfed me. "WHY DID HE DO THIS TO ME?" I screamed loudly, not wanting an answer or even directing it at anyone in particular. It was the one thought that I was able to process.

**Jasper's POV**

I felt her begin to shake and felt her distress worsen. I knew what was coming.

"WHY DID HE DO THIS TO ME?" I heard her shout. At least she attempted to, it sounded more of a broken yelp. She was now bent forward her head in resting on her left hand and she grasped my hand more tightly, with sobs wracking her body.

I tried sending a feeling of calm over her but it was useless. I wasn't feeling positive and calm myself and her pain was too great. I did the one thing I could. I shifted and easily lifted her broken body onto my lap and wrapped my arms around her hunched figure as tightly as I could without causing her physical discomfort. I didn't even notice the scent of her blood, just as I felt no urge to bite her frail neck. She moved closer and placed he face hard against my chest soaking my shirt in her tears. That's when mine began to fall. I hadn't cried until this point. I had simply been angry. Now I felt hurt and confused and worried for both myself and the poor girl in my arm.

I don't know how long we sat this way, with my tears falling to her hair and hers falling on my chest, but soon we were both exhausted, our eyes emptied of liquid. She sniffled a little as she calmed herself down, and then raised her head to look at me.

"I'm sorry about that, I don't know what happened."

"Its fine don't worry about it. You weren't the only one crying." I tried to laugh a little but it just came out in a harsh breath.

"Are you ok with being this close?...I mean you aren't thirsty or anything are you 'cos I could move if you want." I looked down at her red eyes and the expression of hope on her face. I could tell she didn't want to move, she wanted comfort. I shook my head and smiled slightly.

"No, I'm fine. I think I have lost my appetite."

She laughed a little then and rested her head against my chest.

"So..." she interrupted my thoughts, "where are you staying if you moved out of home?"

"I found a little cottage not far away, only a 10minute run away or so...well for me, it would probably take you 3hours. It's a holiday cottage, one that gets rented out. It's empty for now so I have been sitting around there."

"Oh, that's nice." She looked uncertain as she looked at me again. "Are you going back to school tomorrow or are you going to give it a miss? I think I have to. I told Charlie I was sick today but he said if I still felt ill tomorrow he was taking me to the doctor."

"I haven't decided yet."

The thought of seeing Edward and Alice felt too much for me. I wasn't sure if I wanted to be in an enclosed place with the two. But I looked down at Bella and knew she was feeling the same as me, only she had no choice about high school, this was her first time round. I nodded my head deciding I would go to support her...we could support each other.

"Yeah, I will be there."

She smiled slightly in gratitude and moved to get off of me. She glanced toward her house and I realised that it was beginning to get dark.

"Well, I'd better get back inside. I should probably have a shower and take care of my hygiene problems." She had her back to me as she walked away. Then she stopped and taking a deep breath looked over her shoulder back at me, "Thank you Jasper." Then she kept walking and I stood as I saw her enter the warmth of her home.

I hadn't planned on visiting her this morning. In all honesty I hadn't thought about her since I heard the news. I suddenly felt very guilty about that fact. When I walked out of my small cottage this morning I had felt an overwhelming amount of pain coming from an unknown source. I had followed it, curious to know who it came from. When I realised it was her, my heart sank as I realised the destruction Edward and Alice had caused.

_I will be there for her. No matter what happens. She needs someone._

I sighed and ran back to my make shift home.

**Edward's POV**

I sat in school all day thinking about Bella. I hoped she would come, convincing myself that she was just running late. By lunch I knew I had deluded myself. Jasper didn't come either. I could see how much Alice was hurting. She looked paler than usual if that was possible, her face withdrawn and looking tired even though we don't sleep. Rose hadn't spoken to either of us since Saturday night. She was disgusted with us and she felt such sympathy for Bella and Jasper. I could hear in her thoughts she was wondering whether to go and visit Bella to let her know she had a friend-even unlikely one. She was fighting with herself. She spent the day looking for Jasper and Bella too, looking hopefully around the school cafeteria. Emmett wasn't really thinking much. He was scared about what would happen though. He cared for Bella as though she was his little sister and he worried that she wouldn't be around any of us anymore. He worried for Jasper too. Jasper was his brother and he felt pain for his hurt. Jessica asked me where Bella was. I snapped at her telling her I didn't know. That probably wasn't the best move; it sparked interest in Jessica's mind. I heard her deciding to call Bella that night to see 'how she was'.


	7. Chapter 6 Lean on me

_**Tuesday**_

**Bella's POV**

I woke as usual, at the sound of my alarm. Pulling myself up I forced myself into the shower trying to block the feeling of dread and trying to ignore the cold. I had felt nothing but the cold since the discovery. It was as though I was cold from the inside and it was seeping out to my skin. Choosing an outfit was hard. I wanted to stay in my sweats but I knew that wouldn't be a good option for school. I decided on a pair of low rise black jeans, a red top that was quite tight fitting with a loose tie neck detail and went to grab my flat red pumps. That was when I realised Alice had paid for those shoes. I threw then to the back of my closet and reached for my black pumps instead, I always preferred them anyways. I walked downstairs and told Charlie I was feeling better and would be going to school. I didn't want breakfast, so soon after he left I opened my front door and stepped into the cold. When I looked up I gasped in shock.

Standing next to a black convertible was Jasper. He lifted his lips into a half smile and I walked towards him with a shy smile gracing my own lips.

"I thought you might need some moral support...I know I do." I smiled slightly more now and stepped into the car as he held the door open for me.

We sat in silence for the entire journey. I was dreading seeing Edward. I can only assume that Jasper was doing the same. We reached the school in a short amount of time and Jasper parked the car as far away from the Cullen's usual space as possible. He stepped gracefully out of the car as I struggled to lift myself from the low leather seating. When I finally rose I heard the squeal of tires against concrete as a car braked suddenly. I twisted myself around whilst untangling myself from my bag and immediately wished I hadn't. It was the silver Volvo. The driver stepped out in the blink of an eye and stared at me with hope on his face. _Edward_.

I put my face toward the ground feeling uncomfortable and wishing more than ever that I had stayed at home in the safety of my bed. Then Jasper was at my side, reaching for my hand. He grasped mine in his. I looked up to his face shocked at the action. _I wasn't expecting that._

"You alright?" He was concerned for me but his eyes were hard. I had never seen that look on him before. "We stick together. Deal?"

I looked at him one last time before nodding my head. "Deal."

We walked towards the school, my eyes still fascinated with the ground while Jaspers head was held high. I looked up slightly and saw Edward begin to move towards me and I felt Jasper squeeze my hand as his body stiffened. Edward froze, obviously not knowing what to do and how to handle the situation. We just kept walking.

I was aware of our classmates watching with curious gazes and gossiping to each other already.

"You don't think she's moved on to the other brother do you?"

"Why didn't she ride with Edward?"

"How exactly did she bag Jasper? I thought Edward was a fluke..."

I looked up at Jasper as we walked through the school doors. His brows were knotted together, his lips turned in an angry scowl.

"Jasper, you do realise people will think we are having some sort of forbidden relationship don't you?

He looked at me and said, "Yes, I don't particularly care what other people think. Is it bothering you?"

"No." I squeezed his hand in reassurance and he smiled at me slightly, walking me to my first class of the day.


	8. Chapter 7 she's empty

**Authors Note: **Hey guys, thank you so much for your nice reviews. I wanted to write another chapter for you (as a lil present) which is why it is 1.50am here in England and I have just typed another part to the story. I hope you like this little bit, however if it sucks, keep in mind it's the early hours of the morning for me and I will be back on top form tomorrow.lol

**Edward****'****s POV**

I was driving towards the school when I smelt her. Her unique smell filled my senses and lifted my un-beating heart. _Please talk to me. I will find her and __I__ will make her understand. It was a __mistake;__I__ have felt sick ever since, __I__can't__ go on without her._

The tires made a sharp sound as I slammed on the brakes. I rushed out of the car without noticing the other students in the car park. _Where's her van?_ That's when I saw her standing next to Jasper's black car. Her bag appeared to be attacking her, wrapping itself around her neck and upper arm. At any other time this would be funny but all I could think was how beautiful my Bella looked. Suddenly she looked up and locked her gaze with mine. I hadn't noticed her eyes before. They were red and puffy and I knew that I was responsible.

Jasper walked around the car at that moment and held her hand in his. I know I had no right to feel jealous but I couldn't help it, her precious hands had always been reserved for me.

_Oh God please forgive me._

It broke my heart again to watch her walk away from me, her face to the ground, hiding herself from me and the world. _I didn't mean to hurt her._ I know that's a stupid thought considering what I did.

It happened the night I left her. I had walked home and sat on my leather couch. Although I told Bella that Alice had already left, it was a lie. Alice was there looking after me and I, in turn was comforting her. Jasper had disappeared after his attack on Bella and Alice was worried. I heard a strangled moan come from her room and ran to see the cause. She was shaking on her bed, tears falling from her eyes.

"She's just so empty," she looked up at me then, "we can't leave her, she's broken."

I sighed and sat next to her on the bed and placed a cold arm around her.

"It's for the best. She'll get hurt if I stay, I couldn't live with myself if she was hurt again because of me. You saw what happened to her in that dance studio. I couldn't bear to look at her like that again."

She nodded her head a little and agreed. "I know, we all agreed it was for the best. But what if something happens to her and we aren't here. You know what she's like, she's a danger magnet!"

"Nothing will happen she promised me she would be careful." I shook my head slightly remembering the promise she made.

"Alice? What am I going to do without her?" Tears began to fall and I felt embarrassed that I had shown myself so completely. Alice wasn't intimidated by my crying however, she pulled my face to her shoulder and hugged me tightly as I sobbed for my loss.

"Shhhh, it will be ok. You will be and she will be."

I felt so hopeless and alone. When I looked up I searched for comfort and I found it, the kind that leaves you bitter and dead inside. The night started with an innocent kiss.

I shook myself from my memories and took a step towards my brother and my soul mate, hoping that they would speak to me. _Just stay away Edward; she can't cope with you right now. You've damaged her enough_. I stopped abruptly at Jaspers directed thoughts.

_I'm sorry. _Rosalie pushed past me, knocking me into the car. She was so angry at me. I knew I deserved it.


	9. Chapter 8 Friend to help

**Jasper's POV**

I felt so much anger when I saw my 'brother' standing by the school. I could practically hear the cogs working in his brain, planning what he would say to Bella. I held her hand as I led her away from him and to the school. He moved as though he wanted to approach and I saw red. _How dare he?!_ How could he contemplate approaching me let alone Bella. She was crushed because of him and Alice.

Alice was standing around the other side of the car, tears in her eyes. She didn't look good. I felt a brief moment of concern and then forced myself to remember what she did. I felt Bella squeeze my hand briefly and I suddenly felt quite calm.

Walking her to class was an interesting experience. Students were watching with curious gazes, some gossiping, some too shocked to move. I can understand how it looked, we were holding hands. _Friends do this too though...__don't__ they? _With one last reassuring smile I left her at her class and turned away. Now I had to face my own torture. Biology...Alice...Alice in Biology with me.

**Bella's POV**

I walked into class slowly with everyone watching me. I felt as though they all knew my shame. _I __wasn't__ enough to keep him. Now __I__ have English...great. __Sitting__ next to Edward for an hour, __I__ must have been bad in a past life._

Angela walked in behind me and tapped my shoulder. She noticed my red eyes immediately and I could see the mixture of shock and concern on her face.

"Oh my God, Bella, what's wrong?"

I looked down and continued walking to my seat. "It's nothing." I could see she didn't believe me and I knew she wouldn't press me for information. I felt that I should offer some explanation so that she didn't think it was a matter of trust, "I'd rather not talk about it if you don't mind."

She smiled softly and nodded her head. "Well then no other words will be spoken, except, I'm now going to offer you my seat which is located over there." She pointed her finger towards the front of the class.

"Are you sure you don't mind?" I hesitated and then noticed Edward entering the room. He looked quite withered, with dark circles under his black eyes.

Angela turned her head in the direction of the door and noticed Edward's entrance. She firmly shook her head, "No I don't mind at all, anything to help." She flashed me a smile and sat on the seat I had previously occupied.

Edward stopped short in surprise, he obviously expected me to continue sitting next to him. I sent a silent prayer of thanks to Angela and took her seat three rows in front. Edward was by my side immediately.

"Bella baby please talk to me. Meet me at lunch we have things to talk about." He whispered it in such a low voice I'm sure no one else heard. I almost didn't. I couldn't risk having his face so close to mine though, so I turned my face away from him pulling my hair to the side as a boundary. He sighed, and slowly made his way to his desk.

The morning passed in a blur as I moved quickly from one class to another, each one swapping my seat with Angela. _She really is a good friend._


	10. Chapter 9 Fighting for freedom

**Alice's POV**

I walked into Biology and saw him sitting next to the window. Walking slowly over I rested my bag on our table and looked pleadingly at him.

"Jasper please talk to me. I miss you so much."

He glared up at me from where he sat. "You should have thought about that before."

I sighed and took a seat. "I know and I'm sorry I would do anything to take it back." _At least he's talking to me, __that's__ got to be a good sign right? And he's not throwing things this time..._

I reached over and took his hand in mine; it's amazing how the coldness of his skin can warm me.

"Come home, please. You don't have to stay in our room if you don't want but maybe if you come back you can try to trust me again...we can build bridges or something."

He took a deep breath and when he looked up, his eyes showed confusion and pain. "No." He pulled his hand out of my grasp and left the room as the teacher entered.

**Jasper's POV**

I pulled my hand from hers realising that her touch left me colder somehow. _How can she think an apology is all it will take?! _Storming out of the class I wondered to my car.

_I wonder how Bella is._ I hoped she was ok, I knew she shared most of her classes with Edward and over the past couple of days it was easy to understand how frail she is. Not just physically but now emotionally also. I had never really given Bella much thought before. She was always 'just Edward's girlfriend'. I could tell she was special but I had always wondered quietly in the back of my mind why she had such a hold on him.

Now I could understand. She was smart, kind, loyal and with the exception of the past days, she was also funny. Even with everything that had been happening she had made an effort to be polite and constructed a show of strength around her. She amazed me.

**Rosalie's POV**

I spotted her on my way to lunch. She was at her locker struggling with some books. Edward was approaching her from behind. I walked swiftly to her side before Edward made it and let out a menacing growl. He stopped and dejected; he walked in the opposite direction to the cafeteria.

Bella looked up in surprise, fear emanating from her body.

"Sorry, I wasn't growling at you. Edward was on his way over here, I didn't think you would want to talk to him."

Her surprise turned to confusion as she realised I had taken a protective stance over her small frame.

"Thank you Rose, I really appreciate it."

Closing her locker she turned in the direction of the lunch hall and I followed beside her.

"Look I know this must be a shocker for you, but I just wanted to see how you are. I know we aren't friends, mostly because I have been a prized bitch but I know how you feel about him and I'm sorry that I wasn't your friend sooner. "I looked at her startled face and realised we had come to a stop. "What I'm saying is, I'm really sorry and if you need a friend or anyone to talk to...I'm always here. And you are always welcome at the house; we'd miss you if you stayed away." _Well this is awkward._ I looked down and stared at my feet. I had never felt inferior or uncomfortable before but now I did as I waited for a response.

She put her hand on my arm and my head shot up, taking in the kind smile on her face and tear filled eyes.

"That means a lot coming from you. Thank you."

**Bella's POV**

Lunch was a strange occurrence. Before I would have sat at the Cullen's table, part of the family. Now I sat by myself in a dark corner at the back of the cafeteria. It wasn't long before Edward joined me. He sat down opposite me with his face bent low.

"Is that all you are going to have?" He pointed at the bottle of water I had in front of me.

"Strangely I don't feel too hungry. What do you want Edward?"

I remembered then all the good times with him. The time at our meadow where he showed me his strength while showing me how vulnerable he was when it came to me, the time he had playfully tackled me to his sofa, keeping me safely tucked into his chest as you would a priceless ornament and too many others to count.

"I wanted to talk to you. To tell you what happened so that you know everything and can hopefully understand why."

I winced at the idea, "I'd rather not know the intimate details thank you. My imagination's enough." _How could he be so cruel? I just want some time away from him. God where's Jasper? He promised we would stick together._

"I'm not feeling too great, I'm going home." We rose from our seats at the same time. I tried to make my way passed him to the door but he held my arm, pulling me to a stop.

The lunch hall was busy now. Each seat filled with happy, carefree students, enjoying the break from class. Mike, Jessica and Lauren we looking at Edward and I intently, obviously desperate to know what was happening. Angela sat to the side of them with a worried look, struggling with herself; should she come over and see if I was ok and distract Edward?

"Bella please stay, just talk to me." His voice was rising now with desperation as his grip tightened on my arm. I pulled my arm a little but his grip was too strong, it would definitely leave a bruise.

"Edward let me go." I continued to struggle hoping that someone would come and help me escape.

"NO! We need to talk you have to understand how sorry I am." Everything was silent now, the students engrossed in the two of us. His exclamation of 'no' had been loud enough to alert the other kids and now all were waiting for a big climax.

A lump rose in my throat as I struggled to pull away, "Edward please you're hurting me." I saw Rosalie and Emmett rise from their seats ready to pull Edward away from me, but they were too late...someone else helped me.

Edwards grip was torn away from me as he was pushed against the wall, with Jasper placing himself as a barrier in front of me.

"Back off Edward." His tone was menacing, I was almost afraid. I knew they wouldn't fight with a room full of humans but I feared the outcome if they were alone. I took in the shocked fazes of the people around me; Mike looked excited at the prospect of a fight.

"Jasper just let me talk to her." Edward looked angry now, "this doesn't concern you."

Jasper stiffened as though ready to attack and I placed my hand on his back. "Please don't do this, can we just go home?" I whispered.

Jasper relaxed and turned slightly putting his arms around my shoulders to guide me out of the room, still holding himself between Edward and me. Edward followed us out of the room and into the hallway of the school. I could hear the scraping of chairs as students rushed to the doorway to see what would happen.

They got the climax they wanted.

Before I could blink, Jasper had spun around and connected his fist to Edwards chin. The smashing sound it caused was loud and suddenly I felt terrified for Edward's safety.

"STAY AWAY FROM HER," Jasper shouted as Edward recovered his posture. His own fists were now clenching ready to retaliate.

I stepped between the two and looking into Edwards dark eyes I whispered my plea, "Edward, please let me go." I'm not sure if I meant that day in particular, or if I meant for him to let me go forever. It was too much to think about. His face crumbled and he stepped back, moving away from me and walked slumped towards the toilets.

Then I felt Jasper's strong arms around me, comforting me as I cried. He steered me around and led me to his car, all the while ignoring the stares of our class mates.

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**Authors Notes:** **PLEASE READ - IMPORTANT**

I'm sorry that I had Jasper hit Edward but I felt like a punch might be good in that chapter.lol

Secondly, I'm really not trying to make Edward seem like a bad guy because I'm madly in love with himself myself which is why I'm struggling with what I want to happen! You have to admit that this storyline does mix it up a bit though. hehe

Thank you to everyone who has reviewed I love yas all! Keep reviewing and if anyone has any ideas of a particular scene they would like to read about, pm me and I will try to incorporate it! THANX

Also how do you feel about a sex scene?


	11. Chapter 10 stone lips on soft skin

**Disclaimer: **I keep forgetting to write one of these on each chapter but I promise I haven't deluded myself in to thinking I own any of the characters!

**AUTHORS NOTES: **Sorry that this ends on a bit of a cliffy, I can't wait to continue but I have to get ready to go out.

As I'm going out to celebrate my boyfriends 22nd birthday, I may be too hung-over to write tomorrow but I will try my best.

It gets very juicy soon btw!

Thank you for my reviews, keep them coming because thousands have people have read this story and a lot have marked it for alerts, but very few are taking to time to give me encouragement.** PLEASE REVIEW**

**Edward's POV**

She asked me to let her go, but how can I? _I swore __I__ would never leave her again unless it was what she wanted_...now that I'm face with that situation, I find myself unable to move.

I am currently in the schools restroom and I am incredibly grateful it's empty. When I entered, a kid with acne and bad teeth was cleaning his hands, "OUT!" I growled at him. I have never seen a human move so fast. When the coast was clear I locked the door and tore the sink clean off the wall. The porcelain now fell to the floor in a pile of ash due to the demolition I had performed. _How am __I__ going to explain that?_

Sighing, I slid to the floor and held my head in my hands. _What am __I__ going to do?_

**Jasper's POV**

I placed Bella gently in the car; her sobs hadn't stopped since my attack on Edward. _She never should have seen that._

"Look I'm really sorry; I shouldn't have done that in front of you. It's just that I saw him corner you, and I could feel how upset you were and then I heard you whisper he was hurting you and I lost it. I know it doesn't excuse my actions but I was trying to protect you...sorry if I scared you." I looked over and realised that she didn't appear scared of me at all. Her crying slowed slightly as she calmed her breathing.

"It's ok I know why you did it. You have every reason to hit him. I would have but I would probably break my hand."

She turned her head and looked at the passing trees through the window. I hadn't realised how fast I was driving. I had never had to think about it before but I supposed I should slow down a little. Although I had amazingly fast reflexes I didn't want to risk her becoming injured in a crash. I lifted my foot slightly from the accelerator and watched as the speedometer slowed to 80miles per hour.

"Thanks, that's a bearable speed for me."

Shocked, I glanced at her. She was smiling a little...I didn't realise she had noticed my speed.

"Edward always drives really fast, it terrifies me."

The she cried again, sobbing actually. When I turned onto her street and pulled the car to a stop she didn't appear as if she would ever stop. I did the one thing I could think of. Getting out of the car I noticed rain had begun to fall. I walked to her side and lifted her from the seat, holding Bella in the cradle of my arms. I rushed to her door and let myself in with her key and ran with her to her small bedroom. Placing her on the bed I laid beside her and held her some more.

She turned herself to face me and mumbled her thanks.

**Bella's POV**

My cries began to lessen as did the shaking of my body. I realised that I was lying on my bed with a cold body pressed against mine. It reminded me of Edward and for a brief moment I wondered if I had fallen asleep and if his betrayal had, in fact been a dream. Hesitantly I turned towards the being behind me and saw Jasper staring back with concern in his eyes. I had never realised his beauty before. He was the opposite of Edward, yet his beauty was just as obvious. _I wonder why __I__ never noticed before?_

I mumbled "thank you", feeling embarrassed by my public emotional breakdown. Sitting up he followed me, keeping his hand on my back as a small token of comfort. With his other hand he touched my face, turning it towards his own. His hand was cold but gentle and I become very aware that it cupped my check, his thumb slightly below my lips.

"How are you feeling now? Are you ok?"

I nodded my head slightly, trying to forget the intimate position we were in. But I couldn't, all I wanted was the comfort Edward had once given me. I felt my head move forward as if of its own accord. My eyes flicked to his for a brief moment before our lips connected. It was soft at first; gentle, giving me the comfort and warmth I was seeking. I forgot everything but the feeling of his stone skin on mine. My hands felt slowly up his arms before resting on his shoulders.

_EDWARD_

My mind screamed his name as I tore my face from his. His eyes had darkened in what I assume was passion and I lifted a shaking hand to my lips. _What do __I__ say now?_

"Oh Jasper...I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." He shook his head slightly and I couldn't tell if it was an act of clearance or a way of disagreeing.

"No, that wasn't your fault, that was me." His breath was shaky and fast, I could feel it against my face as we were still sitting reasonable close.

"Bella I'm really sorry, it's not right to do this out of revenge." I nodded my head again, unable to form words. _Is that why that happened?_ I wasn't sure. The thought of getting back at Edward hadn't crossed my mind. I suddenly felt embarrassed and rejected and the next words out of my mouth surprised even me.

"Is that what it was? Revenge?" I didn't realise I had said those words aloud. A flash of shock crossed his eyes as he hung his head. His reply was so low I barely heard it...I'm not sure if I was meant to.

"I don't know."

We sat that way for what seemed like hours, unsure of what to say or do. A feeling of unease settled on us before he stood from my bed and quietly left the house. No other words were spoken.


	12. Chapter 11 I yearn for him

**Disclaimer:** The characters are not mine!

**Authors Notes**: Sorry this is such a short chapter, I will update soon I promise. I will work faster if I have more reviews though so please keep them coming! I actually do have the next chapter written so if I get more reviews I will post it today. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed for all your support!

* * *

**Jasper's POV**

I didn't know what to say so I just sat on her bed in silence.

_Why did that happen? Why did __I__ do that?_

She kept her face turned down, looking intently at her hands which fiddled with the blanket on her bed. _I guess she doesn't want to talk about it, __I__ guess __I'd__ better go._

I rose from her bed in the graceful manner I was accustomed to and made my way to her door. Walking down the stairs I realised I was taking my time. _Maybe she will call out for me to come back._

But she never did. I reached the foot of her stairs and took a deep breath and made my way to the door. When the cool met my skin I looked above me, into the sky. _This really complicates things._ I made my way to my car and didn't look back as I sped towards my new cottage.

**Alice's POV**

He hit Edward to protect Bella. _I understand that, we all want to protect her_ But as he stood with his arm around her I noticed a look in his eyes which bordered on affection. The kind of affection you would have for a partner. The kind of affection he once had for me.

_Does he really not love me anymore?_

I sat in the car on the way to the family home and promised that I would fight. I needed him and he needed me. _I know that much._

**Bella's POV**

I got ready for bed that night in my usual routine. I had already cooked dinner for Charlie and I had picked at the pieces to stop Charlie's concern. I walked to the bathroom and took a shower, making sure the water was hot...I wanted the chill I felt to fall away. I changed into my old pyjamas; the one's which were frayed and slightly torn and climbed into my bed.

The difference of tonight was the fact that it was Jasper I thought of. I wanted him to be here with me. I prayed that he would return and tell me that our encounter was ok and didn't change our relationship.

Yet there was another part of me which wanted him to climb in my bed and hold me like he did earlier. That part of me yearned for another kiss like the last. That part yearned for him.


	13. Chapter 12 It's a mystery

**Authors Notes:** Hi everyone thanks for your reviews. I also have the next chapter all typed up so if you want to read it soon, **GIVE ME MORE REVIEWS!** Sorry to be demanding but they are great for my ego and are helping me understand what you, as readers want- although I'm still not sure what the outcome will be.lol

If I receive at least 5 more within the next hour of this being submitted, I will post next chapter immediately!

P.S. Sorry for being evil! hehe

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**Wednesday**

**Bella's POV**

The alarm woke me and I stumbled to the bathroom to begin my daily routine. It wasn't until I was in the shower that I remembered the breakdown of mine and Edward's relationship. I felt stronger somehow when I woke up, feeling optimistic that perhaps everything wasn't lost and what was, could be found.

After washing my hair in my favourite strawberry shampoo and shaving my legs briefly, I hovered in my room, undecided on what to wear. The day was unnaturally warm yet the sun stayed hidden in the sky. I looked at the two choices I had picked in front of me and chose a deep blue blouse which I matched with indigo skinny jeans and my black pumps. When I was fully dressed and had loosely styled my hair into a pony tail, I realised I was wearing the shirt Edward loved. _He also said he loved me. _Sighing I took one last look in the mirror, realising that I was running late and walked out the door soon after Charlie.

I stood on my doorstep for a few minutes, wondering if Jasper would come like he did the previous morning. I stood for a while longer and disappointment settled in my stomach as I realised he would not arrive. Grabbing my keys I made my way to my trusty red truck and began a lonely journey to school.

**Edward's POV**

_Ok, mission 1: Get Bella to acknowledge me- hopefully causing her minimal pain._

_Mission 2: Get Bella to talk to me._

_Mission 3: this would be the hardest...Get Bella to love and trust me again._

On the way to school I listed my priorities in life but of course I only have one...Bella. On the quiet drive I devised a plan to speak to Bella, yet with it being her complete choice. I didn't want to corner her like I did at lunch the day before, it was embarrassing for her and I know that a public confrontation had just caused her more upset. That is why I would let her choose a pace that she found respectable and I would wait as long as she needed.

**Jasper's POV**

I couldn't face going into school. I couldn't face seeing Bella. After the kiss we shared I hadn't been able to think of anything else. I kept remembering her soft lips on mine and I was amazed at how her delicate skin appeared to soften mine. I wanted to be there for her today but I couldn't be. I couldn't face the stares of our classmates. I couldn't face the stares of my family but most importantly I couldn't face myself and the battle which was taking place inside of me.

_When did __I__ develop feelings for Bella?_

If I was anywhere near Edward he would know. He would see our kiss in his head and it was crush him. I know I shouldn't care but I do. He hurt me; sometimes I think beyond repair, but he was still my brother and now that the anger has begun to pass, I can see that he and Alice truly view that night as a mistake. _So why __can't__I__ forgive them?_

I slid myself into my car, I knew I was too late to pick Bella up for school as it was 12pm but I needed to see her. _Should __I__ wait for her at school or at her house? What if she didn't go to school? What if she doesn't want to see me?_ Deciding on an appropriate course of action I started my car and sped down the streets toward her.

**Bella's POV**

Today was better than yesterday. Edward didn't linger around but I could still feel his gaze burning into the back of my head during class. He was obviously trying to respect my needs and I appreciated that more than I would like. Perhaps it was the guilt I felt about mine and Jasper's kiss, or the fact that I was alone with no support system, but I felt my anger melt slightly towards him. I still avoided being in close proximity to him but I didn't feel my chest cave, in hurt and anger whenever we were in the same room.

I walked to lunch with Angela who had decided to be my personal bodyguard for the day, when the handle on my bag suddenly broke under the weight of my books.

"Oh great, that's all I need!" Angela looked up in surprise at the sound of a thud on the floor beside her.

"Jesus Bella how many books have you got in here?" she asked as she bent to help me collect a couple of scattered books which had escaped.

"Well I need them for my classes; you know I like to be prepared for anything." I realised this sounded a bit defensive but the feeling of embarrassment flooded me, showing in my red cheeks. Angela however, did not take offense and laughed good naturedly.

"Tell you what, you go ahead to the lunch hall and I will meet you there. I'm going to put my books in my locker."

She looked at me worriedly before asking, "But what if you bump into..." she sighed dramatically, "you know who?"

I looked around quickly and noticed the hallway was empty except for a few lingering students. Putting the brightest smile I could muster on my face, I stepped away from Angela.

"I will be fine, honestly. Now go, save me a seat!" She shot one last weary glance at me before conceding and heading in the direction of the cafeteria. It was only when I was alone that I let myself worry about bumping into Edward...or Alice.

I ran to my locker. _The faster __I__ move the less chance __I__ have of seeing him. _Opening my locker I saw a folded note sitting on the base of the cell. Shoving my books in I carefully removed it, wondering who had put it in place. It could be from anyone, the size would have easily slipped between the small gaps on the door. My hands shaking slight I unfolded the expensive looking paper and began to read the few short lines.

_I am so sorry about yesterday, what happened was wrong and __I__ know that._

_If you want to talk to me __I__ will come by your house tonight. _

_Leave your window open if you do._

I looked at the paper once more wondering who it was from. _Edward or Jasper?_


	14. Chapter 13 No regrets

**Authors**** notes**: Hey thank you for reviewing so quickly it means a lot. Just to clear something up because I realised that I am being an idiot, I'm from London in England and pumps here mean flat shoes, not heels...(I wouldn't endanger Bella like that.lol)

Keep the reviews coming and I will post the next chapter much quicker!

**Bella's POV**

Getting into my car at school I felt incredibly nervous. _Why did the two have to have such similar handwriting?_ If it was Jasper, what would I say to him? If it was Edward, what would I say to him?

_Do __I__ even WANT to see him? Yes, __I__ think __I__ do. Should __I__ tell him about the kiss? Maybe __I__ should but would that be to hurt him back? No better keep the kiss to __myself__, he might take his anger out on Jasper. _

_If it's Jasper what will __I__ say to him? If the note is from him, he obviously regrets it...but __I__ don't know if __I__ do. I was awake last __night__ wishing he was kissing me again. Is that because __I__ want him or because __I__ want Edward and he reminded me of him?_

_I'm__ confused!_

Pulling into my driveway I noticed a figure sitting on my porch, twisting his hands nervously. I parked next to his car, and as I shut off my engine he rose almost as if he were planning an escape. I climbed out of my truck, willing my legs to work properly but of course that didn't happen.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. One moment I was closing the car door, the next I had tripped on my own feet; which had suddenly lost their solid form and were feeling more like liquid. I prepared myself mentally for the impact of the ground hitting my face but it never came. Instead I felt two strong arms wrap themselves around me; offering protection from the pain.

"Thanks...I should have known I couldn't make it over to you without putting myself in danger somehow." I laughed nervously as I looked up at the crooked smile on his face. He held me a second longer than was necessary as I was now upright, before awkwardly shifting away from me.

"I'm sorry to just show up like this. I was going to stop by tonight but then I thought you might start shouting at me for yesterday and I didn't think facing Charlie was wise." He looked straight at me during his confession but it was obviously extremely uncomfortable for him.

Shaking my head I walked towards to the front of my house; him following closely behind, unsure whether to assume an invitation or to linger in the doorway.

"Come in Jasper." He nodded his thanks, and I gestured towards the sofa for him to have a seat.

He sat down hesitantly and I did the same, taking my place next to him with my hands tucked under my knees.

"So, why exactly did you expect me to shout at you?"

He looked at me as though I was crazy.

"Well...because I kissed you yesterday. I'm sorry for that; I don't know what I was thinking. It never should have happened." I glanced down at me knees.

"Oh," I whispered, suddenly filled with disappointment. I felt my blush begin to rise and as it did Jasper shifted slightly towards me. I saw his cool hand reach out to touch my face, but he seemed to catch himself and instead joined his hands together on his lap. It would have been funny that we looked so similarly awkward, almost mimicking each other's positions, but there was nothing humorous about this situation.

**Jasper's POV**

I saw a blush forming in her cheeks and I so desperately wanted to touch her. I wondered if it was my imagination that her almost silent reply was laced with disappointment. _Has she thought about our kiss the way __I__ have been? _We sat in uncomfortable silence for a while.

She broke our silence stating something that both surprised me and filled me with happiness.

"You don't have anything to apologise for, as far as I can remember I was kissing you right back." She whispered those words quietly as if she was ashamed but I couldn't be sure what she was ashamed about. I decided to take the plunge.

I stared at her face and blurted, "Do you regret it?"

Her eyes met mine briefly before once again lowering them and then it became clear to me, "Yes..."

I sighed and started to move away from her when she caught my hand in hers, still looking down but now at our fingers which were beginning to entwine, "...and no."

I sat up quickly, startling her, "Good, I have been feeling the same." I took and unneeded breath and then the truth poured out of me.

"The reasons I didn't come and take you to school this morning are because 1. I was afraid you wouldn't want to be near me, 2. I was afraid that Edward would hear my thoughts and realise that we had kissed and that I enjoyed it too much, and thirdly because I didn't trust myself to be near you without doing it again."

I felt so much better after telling her the truth. _Perhaps the truth does set you free._

Her quiet response of "oh" was heard again and as I was about to apologise for bombarding her with my confession when I was suddenly cut off by her lips on mine. I welcomed them completely, my hands wrapping around her back, urging her to continue. Soon the passion was building and I began to lean toward her, hearing her heart beat faster in excitement, which only gave me the encouragement I needed to kiss her back with all the passion I was feeling. Soon we broke apart so that she could catch her breath and I felt myself gasping in agreement. I was laying half on top of her now; my hands on her sides with one under her shirt feeling the exposed skin of her back. _She's so soft._ Her hands were tangled in the short strands of my hair and when I felt them go limp, panic set in.

Pulling away I saw a look of horror cross her face.

**Bella's POV**

_Oh God what did __I__ just do? __I'm__ no better than Edward!_

He pulled away from me looking confused and slightly guilty. I sat up and righted my shirt, trying to be as graceful as possible whilst ignoring the tingling of my lips.

"I'll just go then." I heard him say and felt the couch rise as he weight left it.

On impulse I called after him, "Wait! Will I see you at school tomorrow?"

He stopped and turned towards me, a smile forming on his lips, "If you want me then I will be here."

I tried to ignore the possible double meaning of his reply and simply nodded my head. When he turned around again I felt it was time for me to speak the truth this time.

"I wish I could say that I regretted kissing you just now...but I don't."

He turned back to me and his soft smile turned to a grin which momentarily stole my breath.

"I guess this means you won't be coming over tonight as planned." He looked confused as I said this and I felt dread settle in once more.

"Didn't you go to school at all today?" I asked, praying that he would say yes. But he didn't and I knew what that meant.

_Edward would be here tonight._


	15. Chapter 14 I want him

**Author's Notes**: Hi everyone, thank you for your lovely reviews. It means a lot that people are taking the time to comment on my writing.

For new readers (because I know there are a lot) please review, I work faster when you do!

**Bella's POV**

I sat nervously on my bed that night, waiting for my midnight visitor. I had been going over in my head the kiss I shared with Jasper all evening. The tingle I felt down my spine each time my memory wandered to him worried me, causing me more confusion in my already distressed state. I cared for him...that I was sure of. I just didn't know why it was happening now. Of course I knew that we wouldn't have had the chance to get to know each other if all was good in our love lives, but was the reason I had developed feelings for him due to rebound?

_No, __it's__ just because of him._

Feeling a sense of resolve, I paced to my window and pulled the wood down, closing it to my past.

_There, I've made a decision...what if it's wrong?_

Quickly I pulled the window open once more and waited for Edward to arrive. I lay on my side in the bed, with my back to the window so that I didn't stare; waiting, for any period of time. An hour later he appeared.

Hey was sitting on the window sill, looking relieved.

"Hey...are you alright?"

I looked at him in return and felt my anger return to me. I snorted my response; "I've been better."

He nodded his head in understanding and began his apologies. "I know and I'm sorry for being the cause of your pain again."

He looked so desperately sad, I felt my resolve begin to waver, "so what do you need to talk to me about Edward...I really don't need to know the details of your encounter."

He looked solemn as he took in my exasperated tone and expression of anger, "I know you don't, but I wanted to answer any questions you might have about that night. I want you to know the truth about everything so that you can decide if you will ever want me again."

My questions came out fast; they were hurried partly due to the fury inside and partly due to fear. These were all questions I had asked in my mind, yet I was afraid of the answers.

"How about...how was it? How many times, how often? WHEN?!"

He sighed and sat beside me on the bed, us both looking in different directions. "It happened one and only time and will NEVER happen again. It was the worst mistake of my life."

I felt relief flood me as he said those words and I whispered my response.

"And here, I thought I was your worst mistake."

He looked appalled at this and took my face in his hands; forcing me to stare into his black eyes which were worryingly alluring.

"Don't you ever think that! You're the best thing in this world. You are everything in my world."

Tears formed in both our eyes then. "Then why did you do this to me?"

"I'm sorry."

I couldn't let myself fall apart in front of him. I wouldn't. I put the anger barrier back up wishing I could support it with steel as it swayed in an unsteady rhythm.

"You didn't answer all my questions." I whispered.

He dropped his hands from my face, noting the change in my tone and looked ashamed once more.

"It happened the night I left you and the act was perfect despair."

A sob escaped from my lips.

"So while I was lying broken in the middle of the woods, praying for you to come back to me...you were laying in bed with," my voice broke, "...her."

"We didn't plan it, it happened because I left you!"

Suddenly the steel was in place to support my wall and I acted with as much venom I could muster. I clapped quietly; mocking him.

"Wow, that decision really wasn't your finest moment was it?"

He was shocked that his sweet innocent Bella could muster this much strength to fight back, but I held onto my anger, willingly showing him the damage he had done. He looked so upset with tears pouring from his now dead eyes.

"I know and I regret the whole thing every day- leaving you, and then what I did because of it. I will never forgive myself." He paused. "Do you think you will ever be able to forgive me?"

"I don't know, I can't decide right now, there's too much to think about. Can you leave now please, I'm very tired." I kept a monotone voice, masking my feelings and causing him to suffer slightly more. He simply nodded.

"Ok, I understand...I'm always here Bella if you ever need anything." Then swinging his leg over the windowsill he looked back at me as though memorising my face.

I blinked and then he was gone.

I let the tears fall that I had been holding. I didn't know how to save myself from the pain but I knew one person who could. At that moment he was all I needed in the world. I reached for my phone and called him. It rang twice and I spoke without waiting for his voice on the other end of the line.

"I need you", I cried. The call disconnected without a reply, yet I knew he would come back to me.

Ten-minutes later, he was lying beside me in bed, his cold arms circled around my waste holding me while I cried. As he had said earlier; whilst standing in my home, he was here when I wanted him.

He tightened his arms around me; kissing my hair, and I fell into a deep slumber using Jasper's protection.


	16. Chapter 15 An Angel in my arms

**Thursday**

**Jasper's POV**

Bella had been asleep for a few hours and I was content holding her in my arms. While she slept I looked at her pale face and noticed that her cheeks became flushed more than once throughout her dreams.

Although she was unconscious, I could clearly make out the emotions behind her dream state as events unfolded without much sense in her mind. She spoke Edward's name and moaned a little at one point, radiating feelings of confusion, annoyance and distress. I whispered soothing sounds to her and she soon relaxed against my chest with my name escaping from her lips.

"Jasper..."

_Did she just say my name? Is she dreaming about me?_

I knew it was wrong but my curiosity took over and searched her being to locate which emotion she was connecting to my name. I was shocked. There was a mixture of longing, fear, trust and the most prominent appeared to be desire. I thought about this throughout the night, questioning how I felt about this. Then it hit me. I was happy. As sudden as the realisation hit me, I thought of my wife; Alice.

She and Bella were so different. Alice was loud, energetic and graceful, whereas Bella was reserved, clumsy and as a result of this, proceeded with every task at a slow speed. How could I feel such passion for complete opposites? I knew I had to make a decision soon or I would be torn apart.

Bella slept until late on Thursday, missing the start of school. She had looked so peaceful in her sleep and adorable; with a slight pout on her lips that I couldn't bear to wake her. It seemed like a crime to disturb her.

Charlie of course checked on her before he left. I hid in the closet as he took in her tired figure and had obviously decided the same as me in regards to her waking. He closed the door quietly, so as not to disturb her, and as I heard him descend the staircase, I slipped easily back into my previous position with an Angel in my arms.

She came awake with a start an hour later, but I held her tightly to my chest. She looked up at me with questioning eyes and then became fully alert.

"OH! Did you stay here all night? I'm sorry I must have fallen asleep."

"Shhh, its fine, I wanted to stay. I told you I would be here if you needed me." I lowered my lips to the crown of her hair and placed a light kiss on her brown locks.

"What do you want to do today? I didn't think you would want to go to school so I let you sleep."

She smiled happily at me. "Actually I'm pretty sure I want to stay right here for a while." Her expression quickly changed though as she added, "Unless that makes you uncomfortable."

I couldn't help but smile at her worried and embarrassed tone and kissed her fully on her lips as a clear sign that I was happy. After a few seconds we broke apart.

"It doesn't make me uncomfortable at all."

I don't really understand why I had kissed her, I was not normally a forward person, yet I found a lack of control when I was around her.

She lifted her head to meet my gaze and pushing forward, put her lips to mine. It became heated very quickly, with me soon pushing her further into the mattress and positioning myself above her. A moan escaped her lips as her legs parted to accommodate my lower body, and I settled myself against her. I ran my hand up the outside of her thigh and settled it on her lower abdomen, making a mental note of the raised skin I had left in the wake of my hand.

* * *

**Authors Note:**

Hi everyone, sorry if this is bad (and has mistakes) but I'm worn out today and its 1.45am here in England. I was up at 6am for work and then I had Uni (I guess you call it college in America) until 5pm and then I went to the theatre to see 'We Will Rock You' (everyone should go it's brilliant!), so as you can see I have had a packed day.

I just wanted to write another chapter for all the people who have reviewed and I should update at some point tomorrow if I have the time.

But remember new readers, the more reviews I get, the more I feel the need to update!

So here's the deal, if I get at least 10 more reviews I will update at least twice tomorrow! I think that's fair as I am a very busy girl.lol

Also to let everyone know that I understand vampires are usually portrayed as not being able to cry but I like the dramatic element of it, which is why my story contains this. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, I luv you all!

P.S. sorry about the cliffy.lol


	17. Chapter 16 The vision

**Bella's POV**

I was laying on my back with Jasper above me, his lips fused to mine. It felt so good to have his hands on my bare skin. Things were getting out of control and quickly but at that point I didn't care. I just wanted to feel something other than despair. I knew he would take those feelings away for a while and that excited me, making me throw caution to the wind.

I reached down to the side of his hips and tugged on his shirt, pulling it over his head in one swift movement. He pulled away from my so that I could remove the garment and then attacked my lips greedily once more. I traced the muscles in his back, letting my fingertips run over the hard and defined lines in his back. I was fascinated by his shoulders. They were so strong and tight as he held himself above me, careful not to crush me. They flexed under my touch and I felt him moan into my mouth as his tongue traced my bottom lip.

_We are really going to do this aren't we?_

I felt his hand begin to rise under my top, causing the fabric to bunch. His hand stopped just below my bra and he pulled away from my mouth softly. I could read the passion in his eyes and I knew that I reflected the same look. He took a steadying breath before lowering his mouth to my ear and placing a sweet kiss on my earlobe. I arched my back on instinct and my bared stomach touched the hard lines of his.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He whispered, his body shaking slightly from the intensity of the situation.

I nodded my head, my "yes" coming out in a rush of air. Quickly he shredded me of my top and lifted me hard against his chest. He lowered his face to my neck and left a trail of feather light kisses along my collar bone.

_Please make me forget._

Soon I did, as I took the dominant position above him and attacked his lips with mine. We were now moaning and pushing against each other, him being careful not to hold me and holding back slightly. I took a deep breath and as I was about to take the next step on my carefree journey, an interruption came.

We heard the shrill sound of the house phone ringing downstairs, breaking us from our spell. We jumped apart quickly, looking away from each other. I pulled my top back on and walked towards the door. Running down the stairs and to the kitchen I answered the call and was relieved to find it was Angela, calling to see how I was. After making excused of fatigue and sickness, I placed the receiver back in its place and turned to see a fully dressed Jasper at the foot of the stairs. I'm sure if he could blush he would.

"I think it's best if I go." He whispered, looking ashamed.

I nodded my head a little and agreed. He walked purposefully out of the door not looking back as he walked away from me and our awkward situation.

**Alice's POV**

I was sitting in my room when the vision came. I had been going through old photo albums, looking at pictures of Jasper in which he radiated happiness. I was engrossed with one in particular. It had been taken 3years ago and the whole family had been on a 'camping trip'. We had tents and sleeping bags, trying to experience what humans did when they went on a camping holiday. We had thought it would be a good idea to mix this human activity with our hunt, hoping to retain some sense of humanity along the way. In the one picture that had captured my attention, I was on Jasper's back, my arms wrapped around his neck, with my legs around his waist. We both looked so happy, smiling brightly into the camera that I remember Edward holding.

As the memories assaulted and mocked me, I was interrupted by an image I had never expected to see. I gasped loudly and a moan left my mouth while I crumble to the floor.

Jasper and Bella were in a tight embrace upon her bed, Jasper lacking a shirt as he asked if she wanted him to continue. She nodded her head and moaned as his mouth lowered to hers. Then I heard an angry snarl come from Edwards's room followed by a howl of pain. He had obviously seen the vision in my head. I just sat rocking back and forth trying to rid myself of the image.


	18. Chapter 17 Fury and pain

**Authors Notes**: Aww! I can't believe how many of you reviewed chapter 14, I am literally speechless. Thank you very much I really appreciate it- **PLEASE DON'T STOP**.lol The more I get the quicker I post.lol

Just wanted to tell everyone that I was listening to two songs when I wrote this. They are:

R.Kelly- Turn Back the Hands of Time.

Adele: Chasing Pavements.

They are both sad songs which I think reflect Edward's attitude, so if anyone wants to get into the mind frame I was in when I wrote this, please listen to the songs!

**Edward's POV**

I heard a gasp come from Alice's room and knew that she was having a vision. I opened up my mind to look through hers and an explosion sounded in my chest. My dead heart suddenly felt crippled, the pain was unimaginable. I let out a strangled sound, gasping for the air that was escaping me. Although it was entirely unnecessary for me to breathe, I felt panic at the sudden suffocation I was feeling from the images in my mind.

_How could she do this to me?_

I knew how. I had done the same to her. I had forced her to this. Jasper should know better though. He could so easily crush her frail bones and split her soft skin if he loses control.

_Is this his payback? I will kill him!_

I practically flew out my room and down the stairs but was stopped by Alice's beg from above. She was standing at the top of the stair case holding a picture in her hand.

"Please don't hurt him. It's our fault, we caused this."

"I can't just stand by and let her go!"

I slid to the floor and held my head in my hands. They rested against my knees which were bent and pulled close against my stomach and chest. There was an audience now. Esme, Rosalie and Emmett were standing in the living room watching mine and Alice's exchange with worried expressions.

"Edward," Alice began, "she agreed to it. You need to leave her be."

I looked up and saw her sit at the top of the stairs. She looked like a scared child and her expression tore at me. I broke down in front of my family; my mother rushing to comfort me while I sobbed like a baby in her arms. _I'm sorry Bella, so sorry._

**Bella's POV**

Now that Jasper had left, I had some perspective to think. _How did that happen?_

_ I __can't__ believe __I__ let it get that far. I want my first time to be with Edward, __that's__ all __I__ have ever wanted. I want Edward to be my ONLY one! So why did __I__ let it get so far?_

I made myself a coffee and sat at one of the kitchen tables, lifting my legs up to my chest while I thought about my predicament. It was clear to me that before today all I had ever wanted was Edward. I had been content with him. I had decided long ago that I would take him anyway I could. I accepted the danger I posed to him and in turn the danger he posed to me because there was nothing I could do but accept it. He was my world. I would gladly give everything up for him. Yet, when I learned about his betrayal, he had slipped from the pedestal I had placed him on. In that moment I had lost both him and my best friend.

_She hasn't even apologised._

I hated myself for wishing she would. I wanted to turn to her for advice but she was lost to me. Now I was left with her husband, almost crushing her in the same way.

_Could __I__ live with myself if __I__ did that?_

I wasn't sure if I could inflict such agony on another being like that. I just wanted to know that it would be alright.

I wanted my friend and I wanted my soul mate but they were gone. I didn't know if I should call for their return.

**Edward's POV**

After my outburst in front of my loved ones, I busied myself by entering the woods. I came to the meadow which I had brought Bella to and curled myself into a ball on the ground. I couldn't believe she could forget me so easily. I knew I had hurt her and that what I did was unforgivable, but still the thought ruined me. I desperately wanted to talk to her but what would I say? 'Do anything interesting this afternoon...do anyone?' The laugh I let out at the notion sounded harsh to my own ears.

I missed her; it felt like I was struggling to move through a loss of limbs. She completed me. She made me whole. I stood slowly, and made my way through the trees. The meadow seemed empty without her; a vacant abyss only she could fill. I picked up my pace to a sprint and then fell into a run. Leaving greenery and animals a blur, I found myself standing outside a safe which held a precious gift.

Walking forward I saw that Charlie's cruiser was not parked and searched the house for any sign that he was there. Jasper had already left; there were no thoughts from him. I could smell his scent however, which was almost territorially surrounding the bricks.

I lifted my shaking fist and knocked loudly on the door; it sounding more authoritative than I had meant. I felt fear spread throughout my body. I didn't know whether I could stand to see her looking dishevelled, her hair messed with a healthy glow in her cheeks which I knew would have been caused by him.

I began to turn away when I heard the door open. I kept walking; too afraid to turn back to her, only stopping when I heard her call my name.

"Edward." It sounded desperate and I had no choice but to turn to her. She didn't have a healthy glow, she looked pale-almost sick as she leant on the door for support. The limited amount of blood I had left in me since my human days, suddenly came to life and boiled inside; igniting my fury. I took two long steps toward her and gripped her upper arms gently, pulling her away from the door.

"Did he hurt you?" I snarled. She looked at my face in disbelief and shook her head; no.

"How do you know?" She looked so ashamed, standing before me; not struggling to leave my hands. I let her go anyway and moved away from her. Her response confirmed what I had seen earlier. Although I knew Alice's vision was right, I had still hoped and prayed that it was a mistake. I lifted my eyes to the sky, refusing to look at her.

"I saw you. Alice had a vision." She gasped in shock put her hand to her mouth, tears spilling from behind her closed eyes and dark lashes.

"I'm so sorry."

I looked at her then and wanted to take her in my arms. I knew that what she had done was because of me and I knew that I could forgive her anything. The realisation hit me and with no logical thought I walked forward and wrapped my arms around her; wanting to take her guilt and add it to mine. I held her for a long time like this; standing on her porch, listening to her soft cries. I was about to pull away when her sobs diminished but she held me tight and I knew that no amount of persuasion would force me to break my hold on her.

I had missed her body against mine. The smell of her hair was the sweetness smell I had ever had the privilege to know. As I stood there; I memorised the feeling of her warmth, her smell and the feel of her body because I understand the possibility that this would be my last chance.

We were interrupted suddenly by a loud growl to our left. I looked up fast, placing Bella protectively behind me and saw Jasper; his stance showing he was ready to attack. I mirrored his movements and a rage filled growl came from within my chest.


	19. Chapter 18 The End of Us?

**Jasper's POV**

I saw him standing with his arms around her and I lost control. I felt jealousy within me, the kind that has no sense of meaning and knows no boundaries.

_After what he put her through, he has no right to touch her!_

I felt myself fall into an aggressive position, wanting more than anything to drag him away from her. He mirrored my stance, pulling Bella away from me and placing himself in front of me.

_I would never hurt her._

"Step away from me Jasper, I still owe you for that punch." He murmured in voice that I assume was meant to be menacing.

"You had it coming." I shot back through gritted teeth.

"And what is she?" He pointed at Bella who I noticed seemed too terrified to move. Her eyes were bloodshot from tears she had recently shed. "Is she part of your revenge plan?"

He took me by surprise by asking something so disgusting, something I hadn't even contemplated. I straightened a little with the shock, forgetting that were on the brink of fighting.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, "I think you've gone a bit insane under the stress."

"You put her in DANGER! How could you sleep with her?! If you had lost control you could have killed her."

His anger was amazing. I could feel it falling off of him in waves. Amazingly though it wasn't brought on by jealousy. It was the simple fact that he was worried about her and he hated me for putting her in danger. I hadn't considered the possibility that I could hurt Bella when we were alone in our room. The only thoughts going through my mind at the time was how perfect she felt and how I wanted to protect her from harm.

"My thirst has been perfectly under control...I would never hurt her." I suddenly felt ashamed.

"You could have broken her bones Jasper. It only takes one uncalculated move. She's human Jasper!" He sighed and a dark look appeared to cloud over his vision. He slipped into attack mode and was obviously about to pounce. "I'll kill you before I let you hurt her."

I let out a dry laugh as I prepared for defence, "What like you did?"

Bella's POV

I watched the scene unfold and just stood; as still as stone in shock.

One moment I was holding Edward, trying to remember the love I had once had for him, but I couldn't find it. I cared deeply for him but I refused to let myself fall open to him once more. Our relationship was broken beyond repair as was my heart. I didn't know what else to do so I had just held him back fiercely, praying for the strength to say goodbye.

I snapped out of my reverie and heard Edward threaten Jasper's life. Jasper's response cut me to the core, as though he was laughing at my misfortunes. I had to remind myself that mine were his also-a bond the two of us would always share.

I saw Jasper move back on his heels, ready to strike and stepped forcefully between the pair.

"ENOUGH! Please stop this."

Slowly they took notice of me and moved into more relaxed postures.

I took a tentative step towards Jasper, "Jasper, I need to talk to Edward alone for a moment."

He looked so hurt at that. Like I was now betraying him also. "If that's what you want." He whispered.

I nodded my head a little before telling him "I will call you when I'm done...I promise."

Then pulling Edward through my door I knew it was time to make a final decision.


	20. Chapter 19 Im saying goodbye

**Bella's POV**

Edward followed me into my house, closing the door quietly behind him. I glanced at his face as I leaned back against the kitchen counter. He had a hopeful look on his face, his eyes now showing the life they had been missing the past week.

"I didn't sleep with Jasper. We almost did...I won't lie to you but we were interrupted and in all honesty I'm happy about that. It would have been for the wrong reasons and I would have regretted it."

He let out a sigh of relief; a small smile touching his lips. He took a step towards me but I held my hand up in protest.

"Edward, I love you...I will always love you but this has to end. I can't do this anymore." My voice broke towards the end of my sentence as I took in his wounded expression. I had never seen a look change from happiness to despair in a single second until that moment.

"Bella...please say you don't mean that." He begged with desperation clear in his voice.

"I can't tell you that. It's over now Edward." I took a deep breath before saying the last part; my voice breaking again. "I'll miss you." He took two powerful steps across the small room and engulfed me in his arms.

"I will love you forever Bella. I will never forgive myself for this." He cried.

I looked up at him with tears glistening in my own eyes. "I will never forget you. I think I will probably love you forever as well, but it's time for me to try and move on now."

He nodded his head and pushed himself away from me.

"How am I going to stay away from you?" He didn't look at me, just stared at the tiles on the floor.

"I'm leaving. I'm going to go and stay with Renee."

His head snapped up immediately. "When?"

"As soon as possible. I'm going to talk to Charlie about it when he comes home. I don't know if I'm going for good, I might just go for a few weeks and let the dust settle. I just can't be here anymore...not now at least."

He sighed and rushed towards me crushing me in his embrace once more. He held onto me as though I was his source of life and pushed his lips to the top of my head. In the next moment he was opening the door; his back turned away from my small frame. "I will always want you to come back to me."

Then he closed the door and walked into the evening air, the sky clouding and darkening behind him.

* * *

**Authors Notes:** I can't believe how many people have reviewed and marked this fic for alerts! I am so shocked but unbelievably happy.lol Let me know if you like this turn of events. Did anyone see that coming? I know exactly how this story will end and I hope it leaves everyone in shock- I thought of it about a week ago. It's a complete change from the direction I was originally going in. There's only a few more chapters left to go but quite a bit will happen in them. REVIEW EVEN MORE!!! Hehe

Sorry this is such a short chapter but I have a ton of Uni work to get through!


	21. Chapter 20 I dont want to change again

**Bella's POV**

Charlie had returned home from work soon after. I prepared dinner in silence. He could tell there was something wrong as he peered at me over the newspaper he was reading. Once I had set the dinner on the table I explained that Edward and I had split up. He was furious at first, assuming he had left me broken hearted again. I told him that it was in fact me who had called an end to the relationship which kept him docile for a small amount of time. I left out my broken heart and surprisingly, he didn't question it.

"I want to go and stay with Mom for a while. I don't know how long for, it might be permanent. I just don't want to risk changing again, like the last time things ended with us. I need to get away and clear my head."

He sat there for a while, too stunned to talk. He amazed me when he finally did reply, by agreeing to my request. I stood up from my spot at the table and wrapped my arms around my father. I told him that I wanted to go as soon as possible and he called the airlines to book a seat on the next flight which happened to be the next morning.

Everything was happening so fast, which I was grateful for. He offered to call the school for me, explaining that there was a family emergency and I would be absent for a couple of weeks; perhaps longer. I thanked him and walked to my room to begin packing. It was only then that I let my thoughts wonder to Jasper. I needed to tell him.

I picked up my phone and dialled his number. He answered immediately as though he had been waiting for the call all his life. He was at my house in a matter of minutes, climbing through my bedroom window.

I walked to the living room where Charlie sat and told him I wanted to have an early night as there was a big day ahead of me. He accepted this excuse and I only hoped he would not check on me anytime soon.

Stepping back into the room, I saw Jasper sitting rigid on my bed. He had noticed my packed bag.

"You're leaving?" He asked in such a low voice I almost didn't hear.

"I'm going to stay with Renee for a while. I don't know if I will come back."

He just stared straight at me, masking any feeling he had; refusing to let them show on his face.

"Are you taking Edward?"

"No...I told him I was finished today. It's over." He seemed comforted by my answer and let his face relax from the stone it was previously set in.

"Thank you for everything Jasper. I couldn't have gotten through the past few days without you."

He stood from his seat and walked towards me before folding me in his arms. I wrapped my arms around him in return and rested my head against his chest.

"Would you stay if I asked you to?"

I shook my head against his firm muscles and I felt him sigh in defeat. Then he bent his lips to mine, taking my breath away. It wasn't passionate and it wasn't loving. Until that moment, I had never truly understood the expression bitter sweet.

"I promise I will stay in touch. I'll call you." I said as he made the descent from my window.


	22. Chapter 21 Im not letting go

**Bella's POV**

Charlie was shouting at me from downstairs to hurry up. We were running ridiculously late for the airport and there was a real danger I would miss my flight. I ran down the stairs and fell on the last two steps landing in a messy pile that sounded with a loud thud. Charlie came running to me from the porch which now contained my suitcase.

I held my hand up for his help and grinned, "I'm ok." I felt lighter this morning as though a world of new possibilities had opened up to me. I felt guilty about not saying goodbye to Angela but I was sure she'd understand. _I will call her when I get there._

Charlie walked me to the Cruiser, dragging my case along behind him. I tried not to laugh at the spectacle but his lack of co-ordination; which I had gained from him was extremely amusing. I burst into a guffaw at his expense and was rewarded with a glare. _It feels good to laugh._

We drove to the airport in silence, each slightly apprehensive at the new situation. My plane was already boarding so I kissed him lightly on the cheek before hugging him tightly to me.

"I'll miss you dad."

I would never have believed anyone if they had told me my future. Who would believe that I'd have a vampire boyfriend and that a bond would grow with my father?

He wiped a stray tear from his eye before telling me I was welcome back anytime. Taking my suitcase from his hands, I bid him farewell and made my way to the check in desk, alone.

**Jasper's POV**

I had been sitting outside by the cottage all night wondering what to do. I didn't feel as though I could forgive Alice and Edward but I did miss my family terribly. _Should I go home? I feel so alone._ I couldn't believe Bella was leaving, although I understood why she had made the decision. I wished I was going with her. In just under a week I had fallen for her which was completely unexpected. I felt that I could be content with her in my future; the notion that she was my only need kept floating in my subconscious.

I can't let her go.

I checked my watch, it was 9am and her flight was set to leave at 10am. She would already have checked in and would be getting ready to board the plane. I sprinted to my car and without a thought to anyone's safety, sped down the high way towards the airport.

I reached it in record time; pushing through the revolving doors and looking for any sign that she was around. I could smell her scent, it lingered in the air. _She's here._ I began to frantically search for her, hoping that I would find her soon.

I searched all the public access points but was left disappointed...she wasn't here anymore.

There was only one thing left to do.

I sped towards one of the desks, pushing in front of the queue and demanded a ticket. _I am going after her._

I had no bags so there was nothing to check in which was beneficial in circumstances such as these. Boarding the plane I paced up and down the rows of seats twice but she was nowhere to be found.

_Where is she?_

* * *

**Author's Notes**: Does anyone have any ideas where she is? 


	23. Chapter 23 The End of Me

**Bella's POV**

I joined the check in queue, my luggage in hand and was waited for the line to move; when an employee at the airport offered to open a new lane for me. Apparently I hadn't seemed very patient as I tapped my foot against the tiled floor. I smiled apologetically as he led me to the other end of the building to an area I didn't recognise.

He asked the usual details an employee would ask and offered to shorten my wait by escorting me to the plane. He took my carry-on bag and walked me to a secluded area with a door marked 'Restricted Access'. I was hesitant at first but realised how paranoid my nature had become. He held the door open for me; a reassuring smile tugging at his lips and I accepted gratefully and followed him through the door. The next thing I felt was a piercing pain on the back of my head.

"It's time to go to sleep Bella." I heard before my eyes shut and the darkness closed in on me.

* * *

**3 WEEKS LATER**

**Bella's POV**

I stood a fare distance from the house but I could see clearly through the windows. That was one of the benefits of my new existence; my senses were now heightened.

I could see everyone was present and they all sat in the living room with the television in front of them. No one appeared to be watching it however; they all seemed too empty to concentrate. Edward sat apart from the others, sitting in front of his piano, although no sound came from the instrument.

Jasper was there I noticed, sitting on a separate chair from everyone else. Alice rose from her seat on the floor where she had been curled in on herself and walked towards him. I saw him stiffen at her approach. _Obviously they are still having difficulties. _When she reached her hand towards him and placed it on his rigid shoulder, he stood; pulling away from her and wondering to the window. I moved out of sight as quickly as I could and hid my body behind a large tree.

Everyone had assumed that my decision to stay with Renee was really a ploy for my escape. No one knew where I had gone; they just assumed I had decided to leave all my loved ones behind and start a new life. I wish that had been the case. Instead I had my future chosen for me. I had wondered many times over the past couple of weeks, whether this was predestined. When Alice had seen me become a vampire, did she know the cause? Had she just assumed it would be Edward who would change me?

I sighed to myself and sprinted away from my broken family, my "goodbye" left carried by the wind.

I ran to meet my future; my new life, but all I could think was that Jasper would never receive the calls I had promised.

* * *

**Author'****s Notes:**Ok, everyone this is the end of this fic...but I do want to write a sequel. There were so many more scenes and ideas I had for 'what happens now' but I couldn't fit them all in while keeping them relevant.

So...if anyone wants to know who changed Bella and what the Cullen's are feeling then please review and let me know. I won't be able to start writing it for about a week because I have a lot of Uni work but it could be sooner if I get really bored.lol

Im sorry that this ending was a bit anti-climactic, I just felt it was too soon for her to pick one way or another but I promise if people want a sequel I will make her choose.lol :-S


	24. Authors Notes Sequel

**Authors Notes:**

Hey everyone I know I'm not meant to use one of the chapters for notes, but just wanted to say that I will definitely do a sequel. So, anyone who is hooked and wants to read it needs to put me on author alert. Thank you for your great reviews.

Just to say the sequel will have fight scenes as well as romance-and BELLA WILL FINALLY CHOOSE BETWEEN EDWARD AND JASPER. That's a promise. Everyone will find out who turned Bella...and why and hopefully it will be a good fic. Sorry for leaving everyone hanging but I will post the first chapter of the sequel sometime next week.

Thank you

xxx


	25. SEQUEL IS UP

**Just wanted to let everyone know that the sequel is up and is called 'Ruina'.**

**You will find it on my profile page!**

**Thanks**

**xxx**


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